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Dear Mother-In-Law,

 

 

Writing a letter to you may be one of the toughest things I’ve ever had to do in my life. There’s simple too many emotions to be sorted out into one introductory sentence.

You might not think so, but many have warned me not to stay with the “monster-in-law”. This lady can single-handedly change a macho husband into a three-year-old boy. Sometimes I just need to distance myself from “certain family members”. It’s the only way to keep my sanity and my marriage intact, they say.

Not surprisingly, you’ve changed my life. Though your son had chosen me and ours was a love marriage, I sometimes question myself: Am I your desired daughter-in-law? I’m not going to say that living with you isn’t a torture. You’ve insisted on asking me things like whether I will do all the house chores or what dishes I could prepare for the family. You were taking a damn regressive interview of my qualities as a traditional wife. Frankly speaking, being the liberal, independent woman of today, I found it ridiculous.

I understand that during your era, you did not have the freedom to make the decision that you felt were best for your family because that was the traditional mentality: Man is the head of the family. I even understand that you’re afraid of losing the power that you have today in your house, solely because of a new addition to the family.

Many have said that the most difficult moment in a marriage is when the father of the bride gives her away, but I may have to disagree. There is a special connection between a boy and his mother that I know I’ll ever be able to understand. Not to mention the complex in-law relationships that both of us have to deal with.

Mother-in-law, you’re the other mom I received the day I wed your son, and yet the woman that has raised my dream man. We met each other because of a person – a person we both love. We come to family not by finding a perfect person, but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.

Talk to me. Talk to me about your likes and dislikes, about things that move you deeply inside. Let us know each other as individuals and not solely by the virtue of our relationship. Now that you are my mother, I can only hope to be the daughter that you deserve, and the wife that he needs.

After all that I have done to bring us together, I can’t promise there won’t be tough times anymore. I can’t promise that there won’t be heartache in our relationships and turmoil in our life together. But what I can promise you is through that I will do everything in my power to protect our family.

I don’t know much, but I can promise you this: I promise never to replace you. You were the first woman he loved. Somehow I never shall forget how very much I owe to you, who taught him how to grow. You made him the man I love. I appreciate you a lot.

 

Happy Mother’s Day. I love you.

 

Sincerely,

Daughter-In-Law.

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